Mark Itokawa was my last "official" boss between 1989 and 1991.
He was a Japanese American who was born in the US as son of a Japanese consul before World War II. His family returned to Japan when he was young and he subsequently was raised and educated in Japan, got a bachelor's degree in Chemistry and married the daughter of owner of a prestigious, internationally known costmetic company in Japan.
After the World War, with his ingenuity and the chemistry know-how, he invented some consumer product that became an instant hit in post-war Japan. A friend of his persuaded him to form a company based on the product with him. But soon afterwards he felt betrayed in business dealings
He started his own businesses in chemical and various other industries, while in the interim was drafted by the US government to serve as an intellgience officer for CIA during the Korean War interrogating prisoners of war ("So, you were bombed by your own government while in Tokyo, and drafted to fight its war in Korea when you came here," I once joked with him), and eventually settled in electronics businesses in California in the 1980s.
When I first met Mark in 1989, he was doing a prosperous business making and distributing cable TV converters and some other RF (microwave) communication products that he paid US consultants to design and manufactured in his own factory in Taiwan. I was introduced to Mark by a person I was doing a project for who wanted to use the project to form a business partnership with him. That project eventually fell through, but Mark took a good impression on me, and I on him, he decided to hire me as a project engineer and a liaison officer between his company here in LA and his factory in Taiwan, thus started my one and a half year working relationship with him.
Mark is a grand mixture of East and West, old generation Japanese decorum and New World spunk and spontaneity, a multi-talent engineer/businessman/scholar in one short, energetic frame. One thing he and I have in common is our enthusiasm in history and human studies in general. Though he doesn't speak Chinese, he can read it pretty well, including some ancient Chinese classics, and honestly I think he knows more about Chinese history than most Chinese people I know, and in a very detail way. Many times we sat at restaurant (mostly Japanese since he knows it's my favorite) table and talked for hours, not about engineering project or company business, but human history and anthropology ("Look at the differences in the skeletons of the Sung Dynasty emperors they found: just within a couple generations, they came from big, stodgy build of soldier men to tiny, fragile civilian frames," he once shared with me), or philosophy and religion (he has a sister who is a Catholic nun in Japan, which he thinks is silly). Once during a trip in Taiwan, after visiting his factory and all the business meetings, he arranged a special trip for me and him to visit mock villages of Taiwanese aborigines together so we could share and discuss our ideas on the origins of people in Asia.
With all that brilliant mind in him, he is really not a good communicator. They say he didn't start speaking until well past the norm age when he was a kid, and he was a loner as a child--story has it that he once sat alone on the roof top while the whole family looked for him all day long. He has a strong temper too, especially when he's frustrated he cannot express his ideas properly. And here comes the rub: The woman partner who co-worked in the company and co-owned the factory in Taiwan with him, occasionally, for some known and unknown reasons, intentionally or unintentionally, angered him. At such occasions, he would throw a big tantrum and go wild, banging his head on the wall, yelling "I am so stupid, I am no good," again and again. Or in some other occasions, he would come to me, with faltering voices, almost like a child begging, "David, could you explain this for me.." I was shocked by such emotional outbursts in the beginning, but then learned to be accustomed to it and even amused by the eccentricity of the man and the situations.
No doubt Mark is a dynamic personality and has his moments of whimsy ("The most exciting thing about life is you don't know what's going to happen next minute," "I never thought I would have lived past 30," he said) and tough dealings while conducting his business, but he's also very honest and loyal to his associates, contractors, and employees, who have all been with him for decades. He has some soft spot too. Once we were dining at a Chinese restaurant and ordered some fish, then the waiter, as customary, brought out the fish in a bucket to show us that it's very alive and will be the one they'll cook for us for dinner. Upon seeing this, Mark moaned, "Oh, why do they do that.." I asked others in the table what did he mean, they said Mark cannot eat anything if he has seen it alive before it's cooked.
I left Mark and his company because I didn't see much going on for me there, though I knew Mark's grand plan was for me to take over the engineering side of things and then become a business partner of the company. But I was young and thought I could do it better somewhere else then, so one day in my cocky, impudent self I burst out on him: "I had enough here already, I don't want to do this dirty job of being the go-between for you and your factory any more." He was shocked and speechless, probably a bit embarrassed too because he understood those outbursts he had with others might have some effect on me.. God knows he had been extra-careful and kind with me and never bossed me around or even put a harsh word on me, so such comments from me were really unfair and probaby hurtful to him, but I didn't know better then.
We remained friends, though. When I subsequently traveled to Japan and did several tele-campaign projects there for a Canadian guy in the following year, I sent him postcards--he probably was doubly pleasantly surprised that I picked his mother country to do projects in, and I talked to him on the phone, sharing my thoughts on Japanese society ("everyone seemed so stereotyped here," I told him) and some book I recently read ("鴻"--a memoir of contemporary history and the cultural revolution of China), and we went to meals togehter when I was back in LA, just like what we used to do. He actually apologized to me for making me feel I had to leave and offered to continue to pay me as non-resident consultant and some projects to do with him.
We kept in touch off and on through the years. I knew his business was not doing too well though, with lots of debts and continuing troubles between his company here and the factory in Taiwan.
The last time I saw him was in my office, in the year 2000, a couple of months after I started my dot-com company with VC funding in Irvine Spectrum. He came all the way from his office in Gardena to visit me and we had dinner together and then came back to my office. After a few exchanges of words we fell silent, or actually I started busy doing some work at my desk and he fell silent. Finally, he said he had to leave and I didn't ask him to stay.
About one year and a half later, I heard he killed himself.
According to his employees, on that day he didn't show up in his office, and they felt something bad might have happened, so one of them went to his apartment to check, and from the keyhole, he saw Mark slouching in his chair, with a pool of blood and a pistol in his hand.
I was shocked when I heard the news, then I sobbed. All of a sudden, I realized how a tormented man he had been all his life, a lonely childhood, a tender, sensitive heart beneath a hot temper, the feeling of guilt for leaving his wife in Japan, the stress of keeping his company afloat, mainly due to his sense of responsibility and obligation to his employees.. all these he bore day in and day out.. I wish I could have accompanied him more, perhaps brought more joy to him through our mutual sharing of things, that I might/could have helped relieve some pain he had inside... But all I can do now, as I did when I heard the news, is pray that he finally gets his peace and rest in God's loving arms.
In memory of a dear friend, Mark Itokawa, on the eve of his passing 8 years ago.
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